


Like A Luthor

by Vanguard



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-06
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-11-09 17:41:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11109600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vanguard/pseuds/Vanguard
Summary: Lena has always insisted she was nothing like her family. That she was better, would never harm anyone, and could certainly never hurt the people closest to her like Kara. That she was not a Luthor. But sometimes, insistence is just a way to hide fear.ORLena has a nightmare that her worst fear is true: she really is just another Luthor.NOTE: This story does mention some violence and blood in a dream setting. If that bothers you in any way, I encourage you to read something else, because I don't want anyone to be uncomfortable in any sense while reading this.





	Like A Luthor

**Author's Note:**

> THIS STORY DOES MENTION SOME VIOLENCE AND BLOOD IN A DREAM SETTING!!!!!!! I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable with reading my work, so if you feel like you might have trouble reading this knowing that any of the aforementioned things are in this story, feel free to leave and choose a story by another amazing author that would be better for you to read.

The shadow's tendrils enveloped her in its grasp. She struggled, but could never seem to break free of the quiet strength that kept her from moving. She heard a scream and she struggled to turn and see who it was, even though she knew. She knew and she nearly collapsed as she tried to break her arms free in order to cover her ears of the horrible, horrible sound. 

"What's the matter, dear?" Lillian. She knew that voice from the dark recesses of her childhood nightmares, not even needing the face to confirm it. Her voice had a strange quality to it, though. It sounded echoed and sounded dark and cruel. "Don't like hearing your little puppy's whimpers?"

"Stop it," Lena tried to scream, but her voice was hoarse as if she'd been screaming. Her throat ached and she thought maybe she had been screaming. "Don't touch her." She struggled against the bonds that held her until she was exhausted and her limbs gave out from under her as much as they could in her situation.

"Or else what?" she chuckled.

"I'll kill you," Lena muttered darkly, not even sure if her mother could hear her.

Lillian laughed, and it sounded like knives scraping against one another, sharp and harsh. "You can try. But then what would become of your beloved little 'hero'?" Shadows folded in on themselves to show Kara, bound with a green glow to her veins. Lena nearly sobbed as she saw the love of her life convulsing and crying out in pain as Kryptonite trickled through her system. 

"Kara," Lena tried to call out, but to no avail. Whether from Kara's own sharp cries of pain, or her voice being unable to carry so far due to her pained throat, she couldn't tell.

"How does it feel?" Lillian's voice hissed from next to her ear. "There she is, crying out for someone, anyone to go to her aid, but no one is there. Your precious hero, your darling little reporter. Both are slowly dying as Kryptonite makes its way through her veins. And there's nothing you can do to stop it."

Lena sobbed. "Please!" she pleaded. "Stop doing this to her!"

She suddenly collapsed to the ground as she was released from what her bindings. It took almost all the strength in her to raise her head to look in Kara's direction, only to see Lillian's back facing her, another needle in hand. 

"No!" Lena cried, adrenaline filling her veins as she stumbled towards her mother and shoved her aside, landing blow after blow until her muscles ached and she could not even raise a finger. Looking down, though, she noticed it was her mother's face that stared back at her, but her own.

"Do it," she hissed. "You're just another Luthor. You crave this chaos. This control over others."

More tears streamed down her face. "No. I won't be like them. I'm better than them."

Her own eyes stared back at her, cold and uncaring. "You're just like Lex and mother. You need control; you crave it. You pretend to be all high and mighty, but in reality, you're just one step away from turning on her." She glanced over to Kara. Her voice lowered to an almost gentle whisper. "You're only one step away from being the reason that she's dead."

"Quiet!" Lena screamed, her throat burning at the intensity. There was silence. The figure below sneered at her still, but the face was bloody and crude.

She rolled off to the side and looked at where Kara laid, staring at her in horror. She stretched her arm out to try to reach for Kara, but the girl backed away, fear in her eyes.

"Don't touch me," she hissed, slowly backing away, even as the green in her veins made her writhe in agony.

"But, Kara-"

"You're just like them. Killing because you're angry. You're just another Luthor."

Lena felt her heart crack and she collapsed. For a moment, everything was silent and all she could hear was the thrumming of her heart.

"Told you so," the voice whispered next to her ear and started laughing a horrid, maniacal laugh.

And then she broke. She wailed because all she could feel in every inch of her skin was agony and hurt. 

She screamed until her throat burned and it felt like her lungs could shrivel. 

She was a Luthor.

* * *

Kara glanced over sleepily as her girlfriend tossed and turned in her sleep, jolting up when she let out a piercing scream.

"Lena?... Lena!"

She fought Kara's soft grip, even as she awoke, struggling fiercely, muttering over and over that she wasn't like them. She wouldn't hurt anyone. She was different.

"Babe, look at me," Kara commanded, grabbing Lena's chin and forcing her eyes to meet her. "Look at me!"

Lena's eyes were wild and haunted, like a cornered animal that knew its fate. "K-Kara?"

Kara nodded slowly bringing Lena's head to her chest. "It's me, baby. Just listen to my heartbeat. Take deep breaths. I'm here. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

As Lena slowly began to realize that it was all merely a dream, she began sobbing into Kara's chest while Kara talked softly about anything she could think of so that Lena could just take her time to realize that she was here. It was another hour before Lena's sobs had finally diminished and the sounds that accompanied her tears were the occasional whimper.

"What happened?" Kara asked gently. "What happened in your dream?"

"I-I was being held back," she began. "My voice was practically gone and I could hardly move. But I could hear you. You were crying out in pain. And I heard my mother's voice, taunting me. And then you were there, and... they were torturing you." It took all of her strength not to collapse into tears again. "They were injecting you with Kryptonite and, god, I don't think I'll ever be able to forget how agonized you sounded." She shuddered and took a deep breath. She took another moment to listen to Kara's soft, even heartbeat. "I was released, and I saw my mother standing over you, about to hurt you again. And something just came over me. I ran over and started just... I beat my mother."

Kara rubbed her arm to comfort her and nodded slightly. "You don't have to think about that part. Just go on."

"I looked down and saw my own face staring back at me. It was taunting me, saying I... I really was just a Luthor. Someone craving to have control. Someone insane, just itching to cause chaos." Lena let out a shaky breath and fiddled with the ends of Kara's hair. "And then, when I tried to reach out to you, you said I really was a monster. You said I was like them, and I heard that voice taunting me again and laughing. I just- I couldn't do it. I broke down. I believed it. I-"

"Stop right there," Kara commanded gently. She guided Lena's face to her and planted a gentle kiss on her lips. "You are nothing like your mother and brother. You are  _strong,_ Lena Luthor. The strongest woman I know. You care so deeply about others, and you've saved so many people so many times. You are nothing like your family tried to make you."

Lena nuzzled into Kara's neck. "But what if I hurt someone?" she whispered. "What if I hurt you?"

Kara let out a gentle sigh and stroked through Lena's hair. "Lena, you're one of the most in-control people I've ever met. You handle yourself so well. There have been so many times that you could have stooped to their level, but you didn't. You rose above all expectations people had for you no matter what. I don't think you could ever hurt someone."

"And you?" she furthered. 

"Lena," she mumbled. "You are my yellow sun. You are the thing that gives me strength when I feel like my life is caving in. Lena Luthor, I love you with every essence of my being."

Lena felt tears welling up in her eyes once more. "I love you, Kara Zor-El."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this! If anyone has read my other work you'll see that this is much darker than the other two, but I actually write much darker stories usually. For some reason, it's just hard to write dark stories like I normally would within a fandom setting. I hope you guys enjoyed it, and let me know if you think I should continue with more like this. I've only recently started writing for an audience so I want to see what you guys like best! And as per usual, excuse mistakes because I'm a lazy bum that won't proofread. Thanks again :)  
> Tumblr: insertsexualitypun


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